About a year ago, I purchased tickets to the Lady Gaga concert, and had spent an entire year looking forward to this day. Not only is she one of my favorite musical artists... but she is also a very inspiring woman, that uses her podium of fame to support many causes that are very important to me... (and not a member of the Illuminati, so get a grip conspiracy theorists).
Anyway... to make a long story short, what should've been a clearly amazing perfect night, turned into one of the the most imperfect, ridiculous stories of my life. I had a great time, don't get me wrong, but if I were to add a young romance into this scenario it could have been one of those teen, misadventure movies. Now, to make a short story long, I'll go ahead and tell this story out for you in it's entirety :)
THE ORIGINAL PLANS:
My friend's Ashley and Renee got tickets to go with me to this awesome show about a year ago, and have spent the last year getting increasingly more excited for it.
My friend Ashley actually ended up getting a seat with another friend of hers and sold her ticket to my friend Monica, who said she wanted to go but didn't have anyone to go with. I held onto all three tickets for safe keeping.
Us five girls decided to make an epic ladies night out of this and rent a limo for transport-have a few drinks at Ashley's prior to the show-and make use of our own traveling bar for an hour. Then we watch the show, and have my friend's boyfriend pick us all up from the venue and take us back to our car. Should've been perfect, right?
WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED:
After much frustration in finding a limo (thanks husband for working this one out), and stressing about what I was going to wear (which I've never experienced going to a concert before), I was finally dressed and ready to go. We planned to be to Ashley's about an hour before the limo arrived in order to get a good amount of pre-game action in. I was picking up Monica and Renee to decrease the amount of people driving.
On my way to Renee's house, I got about half way there only to realize I left all my money at home, so I had to turn around and go get it. Instead of the hour we intended to spend at Ashley's we only ended up with about twenty minutes. Don't get me wrong, we made these twenty minutes count by taking lots of shots! Monica and I went in on a bottle of Jim Beam, so we ended up making a half and half two liter of Pepsi/Jim for the ride.
So, the limo picked us up... truly epic ride with drinks! Had a blast driving down to the venue- but this part was quite uneventful to be honest. It was fun, but it went off without a hitch. Let's continue to the dramatic conclusion.
The limo drops us off about the time that the doors opened for the show. The second we stepped out of the dimly lit limousine and felt the evening light on our faces, we realized how drunk we actually were! I stumbled out of the car, and proceeded to drop everything out of my purse onto the pavement. Luckily for me the driver was nice enough to help me get all my belongings back into my purse. Ashley and her friend went up to their seats, and Renee and I decided to stay out, have a cigarette and finish our drink before going in. Monica ran in to use the restroom, so I gave her a ticket to do so. When Renee and I were done smoking we decided to follow.
We got up to the door and Renee asked me for her ticket, which I provided... and then realized... I had no more tickets in my purse.
PANIC ENSUES:
We called in to Monica immediately to see if it was possible I handed her two tickets instead of one when she went in. After rifling through her purse she told us she had two tickets, and was meeting us at the door. Once we got up there, however, she realized that one of the things she was looking at was in fact tickets to something else entirely. I finally just told them to go into their seats and I would figure out what to do about my lost ticket (although I was far too drunk to be figuring anything out, by myself, downtown, in unfamiliar territory).
So... I go sit back down on some of the benches in front of the venue and drunk around for a few minutes (how long I actually did this is a mystery to me), before calling my husband.
Me: Hey, I don't have my ticket is it at home?
Husband: Are you kidding?
Me: No, I really don't have my ticket.
Husband: Well if it's here you have the car, what am I supposed to do?
Me: I don't know. Will you call the limo company and see if it was in the limo?
Husband: The number is in your phone.
**crickets**
Me: Will you call the limo company and see if it was in the limo?
Husband: Ok, I'll call you back.
So, I sat there, smoked a few cigarettes... husband calls back.
Husband: They said you dropped your purse in the road and all your stuff fell out?
Me: Yes
Husband: They said they didn't see it anywhere
Me: What am I supposed to do?
Husband: I don't know, how are you not crying? Are you drunk?
Me: No... not really. <--which at the time seemed correct, but obviously was not.
**Queue frantic tears**
Me: I just really wanted to see Lady Gaga!!
Husband: I'll look in your email to see if I can find your confirmation, you go talk to someone
Me: Who do I talk to? I can't get in the doors
Husband: Go talk to the door people.
Me: There are no door people, just people blocking the doors so you can't get in.
Husband: Those are door people, go ask them what you can do.
Me: Ok.
So, I hung up the phone with my husband, went and spoke to the "door people" who let me know that I can go downstairs and talk to the ticket booth. They might be able to do something to help me. So, I went down some stairs (which I'm shocked I didn't fall down because I was drunk in six inch heels) and went in the door. I put on my sober face and tried to ask the guy who to talk to. He sent me to one window, who told me if I had the original card number they may be able to look it up, but I need to go wait in another line, to talk to another window.
I made it to the other line, which was huge. Stood there, by my lonely forever and finally made it to a window. I spoke to the lady at the window who was able to look up my tickets by my name and print me a new one. Crises avoided!!! Yay!
HUSBAND SIDE STORY:
So, after I spoke to my husband, he spent a good half an hour digging through my email to locate the said confirmation email. He found it, and immediately tried calling me back. While my phone never rang, he tried calling me multiple times, and calling everyone completely freaking out because he had no idea what was going on, or where I was. I did text him letting him know I got in alright, but apparently my text got sucked into the cell-phone black hole of the venue. He was pretty pissed.
END SIDE STORY.
So, my seats are in the nose bleeds (best I could afford) so I begin the trek to my seats. Those that know me, know this type of situation is not my strong suit. I hate large venues, and I hate crowds. I didn't know my way around the venue, and was not in my stair climbing shoes. I had to climb six flights of stairs to get up to my seats, but I did make it. I missed the entire opening act... but as long as I caught the main show - I was happy.
The concert itself was epic. One of the best shows I've seen in my life and I've seen a ton of concerts. Worth the trouble. I laughed, I cried, I danced my ass off and all that. Great time, sorry to those of you that missed it.
So the concert ends... and we decide to go out to meet Ashley and her friend to catch our ride. We're all tired at this point and ready to call it a night. We make it out to the benches, which are soaking wet at this point. It's springtime in Utah, which means snow and rain and freezing cold temperatures. None of us dressed for this weather obviously. We're all in skirts and heels. We wait, and wait.... and wait... No Ashley. We're freezing cold at this point so I start calling her, but cannot get a hold of her. So I blew up her phone, hoping to get a hold of her. No answer. This continued for about twenty minutes.
PANIC ENSUES YET AGAIN:
The three of us go back in the breezeway, and I call super husband yet again.
Me: Hey, have you heard from Ashley?
Husband: No... why?
Me: Well we've been sitting out here for about twenty minutes and I can't see her anywhere.
Husband: What do you want me to do?
Me: I don't know... will you try calling her? Or call her boyfriend?
Husband: Yeah, I'll see what I can do and call you back.
Sooo we wait, and wait... and wait. I finally walked back in and asked the first person I could find if there was a first aid station because I couldn't think of any other reason I wasn't able to find my friend. I walked around for awhile trying to find my missing friend... to no avail. Finally, Renee pokes her head in and hollers for me, letting me know that husband has just called back. Apparently Ashley had too much fun pre-gaming and had to be picked up early, missing the show entirely. My husband had finally got a hold of her boyfriend who was now coming down to pick us up... so we wait, and wait.... and wait. The problem then became that I didn't know what his car looked like, and we weren't able to get a hold of him on the phone because we didn't have his number. After another twenty minutes or so, standing in the freezing cold we finally concede and call a cab.
ASHLEY AND FRIEND SIDE STORY:
So... apparently after the opening act, her friend decided she needed to go to the restroom. On the way there my friend Ashley realized she was wayyyy too drunk. I'm not sure if she got sick, or what happened, but he friend had to call her boyfriend for her and have him come get her. Her friend made sure that she got in the car ok, and we're not really certain what happened to her friend. My understanding is that her friend didn't stay for the show either. She had a man-friend of hers come pick her up. In her drunken state... the nice gentleman left her at a gas station in the middle of nowhere with no money, no cards, no driver's license... she had to call and get a ride home from her dad. Sucks right?
END SIDE STORY.
Anyway, back to me. I cannot explain the amount of relief I felt finally getting into the cab either. It was like a giant weight was lifted. We were on our way back to Ashley's to get my car. I'm pretty much sober after all this excitement and just can't wait to get my friends home, myself home, and climb in bed. Of course, as soon as we are half way down the road my husband calls and let's me know that my friend's boyfriend is there to get us.... of course. Luckily he was understanding that we were in a cab on our way back to his house.
So, we finally get back to Point A. We grab our stuff from inside the apartment, and run back to my car, giving it a moment to warm up. We're all freezing cold and it's snowing balls. We just wanted to get the hell out of there so we start commuting back to my friend's respective locations.
Most of the drive is uneventful at best.... until we get about a quarter mile from Renee's house, when I hit the biggest puddle I've ever hit in my car, my car sucks up the water and kills out... in the middle of a very busy downtown intersection. I try several times to get my car to start, but cannot seem to get it to turn over.
Three girls, in "night on the town" outfits, stuck in the middle of the intersection, in the snow... late on a Saturday night.
PANIC FOR THE THIRD TIME:
My husband had this problem with the car not long before this, so I have Renee call him this time, because I'm busy freaking out.
Renee: Hey, Ashley wants to know how long it took you to get the car started after it stalled out the other day? Yeah? Ok, hang on.
He wants to talk to you
**Hands me the phone**
Me: Hello?
Husband: Ok, what's going on?
Me: We're stalled out in the middle of the intersection.
Husband: Are you still drunk?
Me: No, but I certainly don't want someone pulling over to question my sobriety either.
Husband: Ok, well I don't really know what to tell you, you're just going to have to wait for the car to dry out.
Me: Okay... I'll just try to figure out how to get it out of the road
Renee and Monica, at this point, get out to push the car. I throw it in neutral. Now, this is really a site to see. Monica is in six inch heels and a mini-dress, and Renee's outfit is not much less awkward for this situation, and it's snowing. They start to push the car when some guy comes around the corner, and hollers out: "Do you guys need some help," ya think? Do you not see what is going on here? Monica hollers back to him a very firm "Yes," and luckily the nice guy pulls his car over and jumps out to help. We finally get it to the side of the road, which of course is a "no parking" zone. We are really close to Renee's at this point so she runs home, letting us know that we are welcome to come to her house if we cannot get it started.
Monica and I sit in the car awhile longer, before I decide I should open the hood. I jump out open the hood and mess with my distributor cap (I don't know what the hell I'm doing, but it feels better than doing nothing!). I jump back in my car, give it a try, and was able to start it up immediately. Yay!!
So, after this I drop Monica back off at her house, and make my way slowly and carefully home. Couldn't be more happy to be home at this point, and I'm pretty sure my husband was glad to have me home after my fifty million panicked phone calls home.
THE NEXT DAY:
So, the next morning, obviously exhausted still... and sore in all sorts of muscles I never use... I'm sitting out on my porch enjoying a cigarette, when I get a call from Renee.
Me: Hey
Renee: Hey, what's up?
Me: Not much, just smoking outside.
Renee: Ok, well... promise you won't be pissed at me?
**raises eyebrow**
Me: Yeah.....?
Renee: I got home last night, and went to put my pajamas on. When I took off my bra, your ticket fell out.
Me: HAHAHAHA..HA.hahah.... haaaa....
Renee: I guess I asked for my ticket twice...
Me: Yeah, but I gave it to you twice... so.... not really your fault.
So, in conclusion, anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. Still, had the time of my life. Great show, amazing friends, couldn't ask for much more. Memorable for sure. ;)
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Sweet Sin Couture
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