Re: your lack of manners

If you haven't read the email.... this is the email that an evil mother in law, sent her new daughter-in-law to be. I still cannot get over it. Here are excerpts from the original email.

from: Carolyn Bourne
to: heidi withers
subject: your lack of manners

Here are a few examples of your lack of manners:

When you are a guest in another's house, you do not declare what you will and will not eat - unless you are positively allergic to something.

You do not remark that you do not have enough food.

You do not start before everyone else.

You do not take additional helpings without being invited to by your host.

When a guest in another's house, you do not lie in bed until late morning in households that rise early - you fall in line with house norms.

You should never ever insult the family you are about to join at any time and most definitely not in public. I gather you passed this off as a joke but the reaction in the pub was one of shock, not laughter.

You regularly draw attention to yourself. Perhaps you should ask yourself why. No one gets married in a castle unless they own it. It is brash, celebrity style behaviour.

I understand your parents are unable to contribute very much towards the cost of your wedding. (There is nothing wrong with that except that convention is such that one might presume they would have saved over the years for their daughters' marriages.)

If this is the case, it would be most ladylike and gracious to lower your sights and have a modest wedding as befits both your incomes.

One could be accused of thinking that Heidi Withers must be patting herself on the back for having caught a most eligible young man. I pity Freddie.

Now, if I had received that email.... my response would've been along the lines of:

from: heidi withers
to: Carolyn Bourne
subject: re: your lack of manners

When you have guests in your house, a host should be gracious, and make sure that they serve enough food for everyone

You do not remark that someone asked for food

You do not demand that someone else wait for you to start eating. Are you the king in the dark times? No. I sat, I'm eating my food. Shut up.

You don't complain about someone taking enough food to fill themselves. A good host would've prepared enough for everyone to share, and then doesn't complain about it

YOU should never insult the family that is about to join yours. I'm not sure if you noticed, but this entire email is a giant itemized insult- and poorly at that. Next time use bullet points.

When you have guests in your home, try not to get up at the ass crack of dawn and slam pans around. Some people are trying to get their beauty rest, and by the sounds if it - you aren't getting yours.

Don't complain about someone getting more attention than you. Especially someone far younger, nicer and prettier. It just makes you look like a hag.

I'm sorry that my family didn't save for their daughters wedding. In the future I'll remind them that they need to have a dowry. One complete with at least two mules, a pig, and a chicken. Next time... they won't have this problem.

I'll make sure to be "ladylike'' post haste, and have my wedding in a dumpster. It not only benefits my income, but at least you'll look good in the pictures against that background.

I'm definitely patting myself on the back for catching such a wonderful eligible man, and I'm glad to see he doesn't have PTSD or some other mental problems after having dealt with you.


See you at the wedding!! ;)



For complete news on this, go to: http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/sex/mother-in-law-sends-worst-email-ever-to-bride-forgivable-2504517/